Yahoo! I have finished the outer borders of my "diet/therapy" project. And I have finally come up with a name for the quilt..."FOOD FRENEMIES."
A "frenemy" has been defined in the modern lexicon as a type of "friend" whose words or actions bring you down.
I am SO glad I didn't proceed with my FIRST outer border plan...
...I was CLEARLY having a bad day when I did the sketch seen above! Some of you recommended that I NOT use the sketch (but not ALL of you, LOL!).
My bad idea TOTALLY crossed the line between destroying inanimate, tempting food objects and killing off sometimes alive fast food mascots, too human for comfort.
The people playing those mascots in commercials, various public appearances, restaurant openings, and yes...birthday parties (oh boy)...are just trying to make a living, for pity's sake! They may not even eat the food they promote (the lying misrepresenting jerks).
Peanut M&M's may be my worst frenemy. They look cute in a nice cut glass or decorative bowl (and really, how often do we actually get the chance to use and display those?).
It is just so easy to walk by the cute dish, admire it (try to remember which wedding guest it came from), and grab one (a handful) and go (then continually walk by the bowl). And, you don't have to keep dealing with that pesky twist tie and noisy, crinkling bag.
They melt in your mouth, not in your hand. The little jewels won't stain sewing/quilting/embroidery projects (or the inside of your pocket - yippee!). Inside the bra is not recommended...too warm...and too hard to explain the colorful smears on your breasts.
They are easy to "store" (hide) in the weirdest (most convenient) places...like in the pull down tool storage bin on the front of my Genome sewing machine (now filled with plain, whole almonds...definitely not as sexy and alluring).
Or perhaps tucked into a an underwear drawer or stuffed in the cabinet with the cleaning supplies...places not often frequented by anyone else in the house (we don't have to share EVERYTHING with our spouse/family).
It is hard not to think of these cute, goofy M&M mascots after a bad day or an unfortunate encounter with someone. Just look how cheerful and concerned they look! They REALLY want to make you feel better (then secretly mock you behind your back about the tummy roll and double chin).
Why arrows you might ask? Well...first, I did not want to repeat any of the other methods of killing off frenemies, although I fantasized about pounding them with a hammer. But, their small remains would have been too easy to gather and save as a festive topper for my ice cream later.
I love a challenge...trying to aim and pierce their hard, candy shells would be tricky...and archery is a sport, right! This might actually burn some calories. BONUS!
And finally, they so nicely blend with your holiday decor...red and green for Christmas, red, pink and white for Valentine's Day, pastels for Easter, etc. They really go out of their way to please us (yeah, who else does that in our lives, really?).
(Miss Green and Red look so smug, don't they? What they have not yet realized is that in their moment of ghoulish, snobby triumph, I launched a SECOND arrow at them...mwa-ha-ha)
I will reveal the whole top in the next post...then madly hand quilt it to try and meet a couple of quilt show deadlines. This won't be a ribbon-winner, but may give quilt show goers a chuckle as they shuffle through the venue.
In stitches (and grumpily munching on an almond),